Alexis....here I am

[Habitual Perfectionist]

Hi...nice of you to have accepted my invitation for talking. But somehow this whole idea of having to start a topic is making me a bit uncomfortable. I don't even know you properly. How can I choose a topic of your liking? Give me a few options to choose from and I'll suggest the topic.



Or better still......let me tell you the different things I can talk about and you choose whatever you feel appropriate.



Food

Books

Music

Food

Movies

Food

Political Affairs

Social & Economic issues

Sports

Food

Business & Management (Especially Advertising, Marketing, Sales)

Relationships

Careers

Food



Quite a variety to choose from. So go right ahead.

[Habitual Perfectionist]

OOPS.....forgot to add two more categories you can choose from.



Spam & Food

[Alexis]

Hey HP!



The topics I could choose from just about cover all aspects of life.

I choose RELATIONSHIPS. I dont know why, it just seems to be potentially interesting and fun.



So lets get at it.

[Habitual Perfectionist]

Good!!!



Relationships it is then. And when I was typing relationships...the first one to come to my mind was friendship. Who do you think is a good friend?

[Alexis]

In my opinion, a good friend is someone you can always rely on. Worthy of your trust and always dependable. Its someone you can laugh with a lot, and cry in front of, unabashedly. A person you can reveal your true self to. And despite knowing the "real" you, he/she is willing to stick around.

A friend will tell you honestly that you look hideous in that outfit, or theres some spinach in your teeth, or you'd be better off without that guy/girl youre going out with. A friend will help you make good choices and still stand by you when the going gets tough.

[Habitual Perfectionist]

Now I have this friend who was all that you mentioned till a couple of years ago. We've shared the best and worst times in our lives together. Somehow he hit a lean patch in his life and was jobless for an extremely long time. We both hit the lean patch together (we were partners in business).....he left for his hometown for a change of scene. I came to Hyderabad in search of a job.



When I got settled, I called this friend over to Hyd. He came and started looking around for jobs. He was a software dude and the long layoff had made him more than rusty in his skill. So, finding a job in his industry was out of the question. I somehow managed to get him into a job which he really didn't like so that he could atleast earn for survival and look for better options in the meantime.



Somehow I'm feeling that his attitude towards life has changed and he's no more the same person he was earlier. He's taking the job too casually, dreaming high of making a quick buck (baseless dreams....making money was never so easy) and lives in a world of his own. Probably the inertia of the last two years is difficult to shrug off. When I tried to talk this over with him, he reacted negatively saying that If I dont want to support him, I can say it on his face. That was never the case. I wish well for him. I want him to get settled in life again. But he's taking me all wrong.



What would you have done had you been facing the same situation?

[CtrlAltDel]

can i butt in here, or is it only for u too...?the topic was tempting...

[Habitual Perfectionist]

Had I wanted it to be all that private, I wouldn't have chosen this medium CAD....jump in.

[Alexis]

Go ahead, butt in CAD.........

[CtrlAltDel]

i always had very few close friends...but i think of them higher than most relatives too...

apart from all the points raised above, a friend is one with whom i can be myself without any selfconciousness...i need not pretend to be someone i am not, in order to gain his/her approval. this is very important for me. a friend should know the real me and shud stand by me if i am criticized on account of what i am.

due to my personal experiences i have come to believe that people of opposite sex become better friends than those of same sex. i know there are many examples disproving my statement, but its my personal experience n i can state examples to prove my case too.

i have more close friends among girls than i do among males. no, its not that i had tried to have a fling n ended up a as "just a friend"....we started out as friends....