How safe are girls are in Hyd?

by **pepper** » Sat Sep 20, 2003 11:55 am

Kindly send your views on this issue.

by **neeraja** » Sat Sep 20, 2003 12:18 pm

Pepper, save or safe? In my opinion women are not safe any where especially now in AP. Recently, a 3 year old child was raped and done to death, a 60 year old woman was raped, a preganant lady was outraged, the list is endless...
 
 
See the cinemas run in most of the theaters. All cheap stuff, provactive movies. When they don\'t even spare a small immature child and an old lady, how can other women be safe???

by **Not_a_Girl_not_yet_a_Woman** » Sat Sep 20, 2003 4:09 pm

You mean Hyderabad is a safe city for Women? This is best answered by single working women who live here, away from home. But how many of them visit Boards like this anyway?

by **Ramesh** » Sat Sep 20, 2003 4:21 pm

The safety of women is a concern all over the world; not just in Hyderabad. It\'s those cruel and sadistic men who indulge in such activities; they deserve the punishment, which can be a death sentence. But unless men realize their own value, the society may not change. A man should have respect for himself; his own body.

by **Mayavi Morpheus** » Sat Sep 20, 2003 11:52 pm

Neeraja, when I was a kid my mother used to bake cookies and store them in a cupboard out of my reach and give me cookies (or other sweets) only after dinner or after finishing homework. I, being a brat, used to climb up a stool and steal cookies and, in the course of it, I used to slip and fall and injure myself. My father was fed up with this behaviour and one day he put the entire can of cookies, a box of sweets and other goodies that my mother cooked, in front of me and asked me to eat all of them. I was full of glee and started eating and thought that I could eat all of them. After having several cookies I realized I couldn\'t eat anymore, I developed an aversion for sweets. Reason? I had everything infront of me, no restrictions, I could eat all of them, but could I? After that day my mom never bothered to store sweets out of my reach, always used to leave them in the lower cupboard. This was a time tested practice. My aunts used this technique on their kids and their reaction was the same as mine.
 
 
I grew up, my priorities changed, developed an interest in women, always itching, always ogling at women, watching every filthy movie I could. Then one fine day I met a girl, who by coincidence was just like me, itching for men. We had a good time together, and broke up after a year, on difference of opinions. After that my liking for women was never been the same. I stopped ogling at women, I was never excited by rambha dancing in revealing skimpy skirts. There was nothing I didn\'t know or didn\'t see. I developed respect for women which was lacking before I met this girl.

by **Kulcha Hyderabadi** » Sun Sep 21, 2003 9:58 am

In other words, you grew up Morphy. But tell me, how many people go through the same experience in life as you did until they reach a stage where nothing attracts them anymore? Take your example, you lost interest only after experiencing everything! You were fortunate to find a girl with similar interests, etc., etc. But think about so many people who are frustrated and don\'t have the resources to satisfy their biological needs; living in conservative societies and bombarded daily with sexually explicit movies, hoardings, television programs, print media etc., etc. makes them go crazy and they do things that a sane mind can\'t even think of. That is why, there is so much disbelief and horror when one reads about these extreme cases.

by **fren** » Sun Sep 21, 2003 3:46 pm

Why don\'t you join a college as a lecturer? You can be a good one. As far as Hyderabad females are concerned, I think even males are not safe here, forget about females. A guy raped by a group of gals, 36 yrs old lady caught raping a 7 yrs old kid... nobody is safe here. I don\'t usually go out of my room. Who knows? Oh God, save my izzat!!!

by **fren** » Sun Sep 21, 2003 3:51 pm

OK dude, aren\'t you safe? Now we are in the 21st century where we don\'t really distinguish between sexes. Now females are no more weak. They have been giving tough competion to guys in all the fields. So, why do we ask if gals are safe? If they are not, nobody is safe, right?

by **Mayavi Morpheus** » Mon Sep 22, 2003 7:58 am

Kulcha,
 
 
Here the problem is not sexually explicit movies or magazines. It\'s the indirect effect these magazines have on crime rate. I don\'t see the movies or magazines as a problem in the first place.
 
 
Anyway, there are two solutions to this problem as you see it:
 
 
One way to solve this problem is the Taliban style (as I call it). All women clad in burkhas/hijabs from top to toe, blind all men, stuff their noses, cut off their hands so that they can\'t see or smell women and can\'t feel them. This is the best possible solution - use of brute force. Banning \'A\' certified movies, total ban on *western influence* - wearing jeans - and wearing only salwar kameez for gals, etc. are the milder solutions (but these are not *complete* solutions as a sari clad girl is sexier than a bikini clad women to me and I am not alone in this thought). But is this the solution to the problem of negative influence of sex on society? No, you are merely restraining people from watching or doing things which they\'ll do anyway in their life. That\'s nature and that\'s a must for our survival. And by implementing such restrictions you are imposing your view on society. Everyone may not agree with you. You object to dirty videos and movies. Someone else finds heroines in movies irksome, and a mullah in my neighbourhood doesn\'t like working women!
 
 
The other way to solve the problem is my cookie example and, believe me, it works.
 
 
Is it not true that 90% of guys (students, dunno about gals) rave for sex in their teens? Is it because of movies? I don\'t think so. Why should we deny them the pleasure just for the sake of it? Can\'t we allow them to do what they want at the same time make them aware of the responsibilities associated with such pleasures? This can be done in schools (awareness). Don\'t encourage sex, but why not encourage friendship?
 
 
In all my years of life, I have had varying experiences and I observed that those who didn\'t have any interaction with girls never had any respect for women. In the western world, most teenage guys have gal friends and most gals have boy friends. This makes them understand each other and they have respect for each other which goes beyond college. Most of the guys do not tease gals in public places nor do they assault women (like in India) and mind you this is the society where they show explicitly sexual scenes in PG movies. I don\'t see it leading to crime!
 
 
BTW, in the US a women is assaulted every 6 seconds and every two minutes there is a rape attempt. In India the rate is much less (rape every 6 minutes or so, not sure) but how many actually report the assaults? If women in India start reporting minor assaults then there won\'t be enough paper to fill the FIR\'s. Is all this due to cinema? In rural India (80% of India) nearly 50% (rough figures) of the lower class/caste and poor women are raped by upper class women. Are they influenced by watching a dancing Rambha in miniskirts or watching Bipasha\'s Jism? Unfortunately, even the cookie trick will not work in this case

.
 
 
A report showed that 75% of women in Chennai were sexually abused at some stage or other in their life (some 30% under the age of 12), and that figure is 50% in Hyderabad. Is this all attributed to cinema or western influence? All this happening in India! Talk of the Great Indian culuture, we respect women, duh.
 
 
When did you last see a gal walking alone on the street after 9.00 in the evening? Will this change if Bipasha dons a burkha or shops stop selling Jeans and skirts? I am not implying that all this will change if we allow boys and gals to interact, no sir. It will not change completely, but atleast some people will change. They will affect their circle and this will have a cascading effect. Police or law cannot take action on people assaulting women because there are simply too many people indulging in those acts and mind you most of them have sisters and 100% of them have mothers.
 
 
We should encourage interaction between boys and gals at a tender age, at an age when they see all the world as the same and they don\'t differentiate b/w men and women and let it continue even after reaching adolscence. But I understand that there is a flip side to it, an evil called the \"society\" which never minds its own frikkin\' business and always interferes in others personal affairs. \"Gee... you didn\'t take any dowry for ur son? You know what, I have seen your daughter talking to a guy in the bus and they didn\'t look like friends When will you marry your daughter off...\"
 
 
Just my humble opinion. Forgive my ramblings... Phew!

by **Kulcha Hyderabadi** » Mon Sep 22, 2003 9:24 am

Thanks Morphy, but where\'s the solution?
 
 
We hid the cookie jar and cut the dipping hand (Taliban style). It didn\'t work and we made the cookie jar easy for the dipping hand (US style). It doesn\'t work either. The statistics prove it. So, where do we go from here?

by **Mayavi Morpheus** » Mon Sep 22, 2003 11:07 am

We are not Amrus nor are we Afghanis. India needs a different solution. I don't know the solution, but I know that yours and Neeraja\'s (add Shivasena, the torch bearers of Indian culture and traditions) are not right.
 
 
May be we should follow what American Indians follow. They let their children live like Americans, but always remind them of their Indian origin.

by **sunny** » Mon Sep 22, 2003 12:06 pm

Push off, ok. I already started this board. Go to some old boards and check for yourself. This is such a boring issue, man. I\'ve got to say something, \"Wake up and smell the coffee.\" Welcome to the 21st century guys. Gals are aware of all the evils and know how to avoid any. They know how to handle the situation, at least virtually. And Morpheus, I like the sentence where you said a sari clad girl is sexier than a bikini clad woman, and I am not alone with this thought that is so true man.

by **Moonbeam** » Mon Sep 22, 2003 8:28 pm

The Cookie trick made me think. But I don\'t know whether the same applies to serious issues. There\'s a time for everything. Kids should not be given more then they can chew. May be I would have had a different opinion if I grew up in a co-ed environment.

by **bornhyderabadi** » Tue Sep 23, 2003 11:41 am

In my view it\'s the women who are to be blamed, for they don\'t bring many issues to notice, and suffer. Sorry for sounding so harsh but, it\'s the fact.
 
 
In India, a female child is molested right from her childhood by her own people and by people from outside. It could be in the form of uncles, neighbours and even fathers. When a child brings this to the notice of her parents one of which may be guilty, in 99 percent of the cases they are asked to forget the incident for they think if it\'s made public they will have to face humiliation. Here, to an extent, the child starts to think it\'s OK. Or worse, she might even develop a complex which will haunt her for rest of her life.
 
 
Here the same guy in the form of uncle, neighbour or father who outraged the modesty of the child is left scot free and starts to think that it\'s okay to do anything to any girl and he can get away unscathed.
 
 
See, be it India or America you will have some psychos moving around, but in America more crimes are reported and fast justice is done. So, people don\'t take it for granted and think twice, thrice, or n number of times before commiting such crimes. Here, in India most of such cases are not reported for the fear of humiliation. So, these crooks get away.
 
 
I don\'t say that it will not put them in an odd posotion if they come out in the open, but they need to put up with it as they have already suffered. They have nothing to lose and, moreover, if they get justice they will be more content and happy. And it will act as a deterrent.

by **neeraja** » Tue Sep 23, 2003 5:53 pm

Fren, stop being a baby. Whether it\'s the 21st century or the 50th century, a woman is a woman. If a man gets gang raped nothing happens to him, while for a woman, there are lots of biological changes in her body. Why don\'t you understand this simple logic?
 
 
Women many not be weaker in the competitive race for careers, etc. but still a woman is a woman.

by **sunny** » Wed Sep 24, 2003 7:27 am

Pavani, Pavani! No wonder the moderator keeps a watch on you. It\'s really sad that you have such neighbours. Or may be they are trying to follow one of the commandments - love thy neighbour as tThyself. Slightly modified - Molest thy neighbour. But one thing is for sure. Gals enjoy molestation if the molester is someone they like/love. Anyways, no one in this board is sure about Pavani\'s credibility. I think you all must watch a movie called - Split Wide Open. It stars Rahul Bose, but the concept is good (although it\'s in contrast to my defence on this board).
 
 
PS: No wonder the moderator discarded your posting. Sorry I posted this on the wrong board.

by **Mayavi Morpheus** » Wed Sep 24, 2003 11:46 pm

Nicely put. In my view, the culprit is not just the woman, but the \"society\" - men and women who make up the society. The victims don\'t complain because they fear of becoming social outcasts. People taunt them and their life becomes a living hell. They choose to suffer silently.
 
 
In case of America or the west, in general, if something similar happens the neighbours are the first to complain to the cops. They never interfere in neighbours\' affairs, but always watch out for child abuse. The family is not made a social outcast. So, the victims feel free to complain. Even the police treatment is a lot more humane.
 
 
If a girl is molested or abused then the \'society\' blames the girl for looking good and dressing well and never blames the culprit.

by **zorro2world** » Mon Sep 29, 2003 8:36 pm

Safety is a state of mind. LAPD or Scotland yard [which are the best in business!] can\'t save you, if you invite trouble. Au contraire, if you take a little care [read: observe your surroundings] then chances are, you\'ll never get into trouble anywhere. More often than not people invite trouble on to themselves, and when the situation gets out of control everyone starts to blame the society or the system. Case to point, especially for ladies. Be a little careful about what you wear, how you talk, and where you go and hang around. It sounds MCPish, but let\'s get real. You are not in the Western hemisphere as much as you would like to believe it. The clock ticks slower than most parts of the world. So accept and adapt to the changes as per majority.
 
 
Frankly, there\'s no harm in that. You don\'t need to prove women\'s liberation by burning bra\'s. Moot point - relax, chill out, have fun, try to blend in with the culture/society, yet keep your identity intact. And, slowly you\'ll see changes in the world around you to your liking.

by **Mayavi Morpheus** » Mon Sep 29, 2003 10:14 pm

Yeah, right! That\'s what these \'stupid\' women don\'t understand. Why go out and invite trouble? Why not just sit at home? If you fear that someone might barge into your home and assault you, then wear chastity belts, underwear, and a burkha on top of it. And if you still have concerns aboout safety, then disfigure your face with some acid or something like that. Then no one will dare touch you. See it\'s so easy!!!

by **Pashu** » Tue Sep 30, 2003 8:27 am

I was in Hyderabad last month. My wife and I went to a late night movie and on our way back we saw so many women coming out of the theatre and going to their homes (not accompanied by men; they were alone). I told my wife, \"See how our city is a safe place.\" On the other hand, you won\'t see girls walking on the streets so freely in any American city. I GUARANTEE YOU.

by **Girl_who\'s_just_browsing** » Tue Sep 30, 2003 6:58 pm

\'Disfigure ypur face with acid\'! That\'s such a crude way of talking.

by **Mayavi Morpheus** » Tue Sep 30, 2003 8:22 pm

But it works, right? If you are ugly who\'s gonna assault you? Hahahahaa... All you women! If you want to be safe, do what the moral brigade is advising. Veil veil veil...

by **JustaLittleUnwell** » Tue Sep 30, 2003 8:22 pm

Sadly, sarcasm gets lost now and then... But it\'s okay

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