Fav li\'l johnny jokes

[lucifer_in_disguise]

hi all lets share some best lil johny jokes....here i found one:

... A grade school teacher gave the assignment to her class, that each student should think of a story and then a moral for that story to share with the class the next day. The following day the teacher asks for the first volunteer to tell their story, and little Suzy raises her hand.
\"My dad owns a farm and every Sunday we load the chicken eggs on the truck and drive into town to sell them at the market. Well, one Sunday we hit a big bump and all the eggs flew out of the basket and onto the road.\" The teacher asks for the moral of the story and Suzy replies,
\"Don\'t keep all your eggs in one basket.\"

Next little Lucy offers to tell her story Lucy, and she says,
\"Well my dad owns a farm too and every weekend we take the chicken eggs and put them in the incubator. Last weekend only 8 of the 12 eggs hatched.\" The teacher asks for the moral of the story and Lucy replies,
\"Don\'t count your eggs before they\'re hatched.\"

Finally it\'s little Johnny\'s turn and he says,
\"My uncle Ted fought in the Vietnam war, and his plane was shot down over enemy territory. He jumped out before it crashed with only a machine gun, a machete, and case of beer. On the way down he drank the case of beer.\" \"Unfortunately, he landed right in the middle of 100 Vietnamese soldiers. He shot 70 with his machine gun, but ran out of bullets, so he pulled out his machete and killed 20 more. The blade on his machete broke, so he killed the last ten with his bare hands.\"

The teacher looks in shock at Johnny and asks if there is possibly any moral to his story and Johnny replies,
\"Don\'t mess with uncle Ted when he\'s been drinking.\"

[Kulcha Hyderabadi]

The Telemarketer:
When Sarah the telemarketer called the Smith residence, little Johnny answered, \"Hello,\" in a soft voice. The telemarketer asked if she could speak to Johnny\'s mother.
Johnny said, \"She\'s busy right now.\"
She then asked, \"Is your father home?\"
\"Yes.\"
\"Can I speak to him?\"
\"No, he\'s busy right now.\"
\"Is there anyone else there?\"
Johnny replied, \"The police are here.\"
\"Well, can I talk to them?\"
\"No, they\'re busy.\"
\"Is there anybody else there?\"
\"Yes, the firemen are here.\"
\"Can I speak to them?\"
\"No, they\'re busy too.\"
\"What is everyone doing?\"
In a low voice, Johnny answered, \"They\'re looking for me.\"

[luci]

A third grade teacher always took roll call each morning and had the pupils\' answer by reciting a short poem.
The first kid sat in the first row was a teacher\'s pet. He stood and said, \'My name is Dan, and when I become a man, I would like to go to Japan if I can, and I think I can.\'
The next kid was a little girl who sat in the middle of the room. She stood up and answered the roll call by stating, \'My name is Suzy, and when I become a lady I would like to have a baby...if I can, and I think I can.\'
The next on the list was Little Johnny, a smart guy sitting in the back of the room. He stood up and said, \'My name is Johnny, and I don\'t give a damm about Japan but I would like to help Suzy in her plan if I can and I think can

[khajabi]

Johnny in 5th class ask his teacher what is the meaning of \"NATORE\", the teacher got puzzled as did not heard this word before and tried to divert his mind to other subjects, but Johnny kept nagging until teacher promised to tell the meaning the other day. The day after, as soon as teacher enterred the classroom, Johnny stood and repeated the same question, the teacher embrassed and asked johnny \'how do you spel that johnny\' he plainly replied \"N.A.T.U.R.E.\", the teacher lost his temper as he spend all his night searching for the word in the dictionaries. He scolded johnny and ask him to get out of his class... johnny pleaded, please sir, sorry sir, i\'ll not do it again sir, after all it is the question of my \"FATORE\" \"F.U.T.U.R.E
Hey, don\'t tell me that it is of MTV haan.