Are girls the problem?

[bT]

Why is it that I see many [guys] suggesting the girl to stick to the religion and telling her to suggest her bf to change the religion? for both the hindu's and muslim alike...



i mean why double standards... if you think it's ok for the girl to marry a not-same-religion person than why is it that you want her to stick to the religion while the guy has to change his religion...



I do like some ppl who take a route which they say to decide the religion before going any further.... but some ppl like to promote their religion no matter if it's a guy or girl... but when it's a girl it's looking like a status issue? why is that...



I am a muslim living in USA and i hate when ppl pretend to be so open minded but yet they are the ones who are so close minded.

[smack]

Yaar, pyar karte ho insaan se, shaadi karte ho insaan se. Yeh religion kyaa hotaa hai??



I do not understand why any person need to change religion for marriage?? U want open mindedness?? Then let the religion remain what it is. If the girl is Hindu, let her follow her faith even after marriage and same with the guy as well.



Wiasey, I have'nt heard of people asking for change in religion when marrying a hindu. Atleast it is not mandatory as far as the religion is concerned.

[bT]

well people are open minded as long as its their own life but when it comes to their child they become possesive... very few can deal with it but many fail...



I just felt by reading many post that everyone in giving their openminded suggestion is in-turn possesive of their religion... even those who are married into other religion and it's just feel odd.

[CtrlAltDel]

any friction about religion starts only aftre a child comes into the picture. thats why i always maintain that its best for both the husband n wife to follow a common religion. its best if one of them converts to the partner's religion. abt what religion they shud follow, its best left for the couple to decide by themselves.

[DSOTM]

How about having 2 children and letting the first one follow mom's religion and the second one dad's religion.

[bT]

DSTOM that will be more devastating than the first as the first sibling will want to be in another siblings shoes and vice versa...



as per as many contact that I have been it makes sense to chose a religion before going for marriage as it gives sound foundation... other wise not just parents will be confused but the kids will end up confused as well as to what should they believe in...

[Whiz]

In the society that treats the father as the head of the house, then may be it should be the father's religion.



The point is simple. You love this person, so much that you committed your entire life to that person. Why should the child's religion be of any issue. Raise the kid with what good each religion teaches and at the same time make sure that the kid gets to celebrate festivals and holidays in both the religions. If you want to put something on paper, let the child decide. Let the kid pick the religion he wants from two peices of paper. And voila ... there is the solution. Even when you both have a quarrel, at least you can't fight over it.



My fiancee and I, we have decided to leave the religion as 'N/A' for our kids. But we will make sure that our children get to know both the religions so that they are comfortable and very liberal about them.

[CtrlAltDel]

How about having 2 children and letting the first one follow mom's religion and the second one dad's religion.

impractical and unfair to the kids

[bT]

In the society that treats the father as the head of the house, then may be it should be the father's religion.

The point is simple. You love this person, so much that you committed your entire life to that person. Why should the child's religion be of any issue. Raise the kid with what good each religion teaches and at the same time make sure that the kid gets to celebrate festivals and holidays in both the religions. If you want to put something on paper, let the child decide. Let the kid pick the religion he wants from two peices of paper. And voila ... there is the solution. Even when you both have a quarrel, at least you can't fight over it.

My fiancee and I, we have decided to leave the religion as 'N/A' for our kids. But we will make sure that our children get to know both the religions so that they are comfortable and very liberal about them.

it's easy said than done... small quarrel's are the reason's for big fights and it really hurts when small quarrel's become too big to resolve and even painful is when you have them 15 or 25 years into marriage.... because thats' when kids get to the age of 14-20 and trying to figure out what to belive in... just like how conservative ppl's children have liberal thoughts... same goes for the kids of liberal parents who will have conservative thoughts...



should we call them Allah's way or the karma.... what goes around comes around...



lolzzzzzz don't we just love kids

[Reality]

The other thing to do would be to adopt a third religion. But the best would be to give up religion and teach the child to listen to his own conscience.

[Girl somewhere]

I am a product of a mixed religion and if there's one issue thats caused a lot of conflict at home, it is this. The oft-hated word, religion.



Its naive to suggest 'let the kids choose their own religion'. During the growing up years the kid will be influenced by the more dominating parent and there's a good chance that he/she will end up following that religion. 'Let kids follow their conscience' looks good in books. Its highly impractical though, during the early years. The same thought will be well understood only once the children have grown.



My mother is a hindu and my dad is a christian. For all practical purposes I call myself a hindu because I can't identify with christianity. Nothing against christianity but I have something against the so called nuns and some christians because they are waiting for a chance to convert people. I think its sick.



And what is that rubbish about 'since the father is the head', his religion should be followed ? We Indians are very parochial in our outlook. I wish we would just leave it to the kids to follow what they want, when they come of age.

[HH]

Language May Be Simpler ...



* I have seen girls marry different language boys and getting along merrily ...



# We (Telugus) have welcomed girls of other languages and have been surprised to see them speak Telugu fluently ...



^ Likewise Our girls married into other language families and are living famously!



Telugu Or Not They Do Know English / Hindi To Help The Families Adjust ... Regaring Religion, too, mixed marriages have been successful!