'Wu hooo ! The Man's rules..'

[aint this cute?]

To the women in our lives ! We men are simple creatures and so All rules are # in order prority and simplicity:





1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.



1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.



1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way.



1. Crying is blackmail.



1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one:



Subtle hints do not work!

Strong hints do not work!

Obvious hints do not work!

Just say it!



1. Yes, and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.



1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do.Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.



1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.



1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.



1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us to act like soap opera guys.



1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.



1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.



1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.



1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.



1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions and neither do we.



1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.



1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.



1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.



1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.



1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine...Really.



1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or monster trucks.



1. You have enough clothes.



1. You have too many shoes.



1. I am in shape. Round is a shape.

[Alsi_badmash]

This is the holy grail to understanding men...



It's funny... really funny..



~Badmash~

[Lady with the Lamp]

lol!!! That was funny! Hey I'm just glad they still make funny guys! (I'm hoping this is not a cut, copy paste job).

[Asli_badmash]

Sorry to dash your hopes.. Lady with a batti (lamp).. I have read these rules time and again..



No disrespect to "aint this cute ? "... you did a great job of compiling this list..



Lady with a Lamp: Why do you need a Batti... Didnt pay your electric bills ? Hahahaha.



~Badmash~

[azazel]

OK

[Fiddler]

Ah, a breath of fresh air in a world made stuffy by the presence of too many feminists...



Jokes aside, I think both genders need to make a serious effort in understanding the other: accept us for what we are, and we'll accept you for what you are!



Of Men, Women and the Mutable World:

The problem with women is that they expect men to change, but men don't. The problem with men is that they expect women not to change, but women do.

[Lady with the Lamp]

I call myself by that nic bcoz I believe I light up people's lives....!!!!.....

So much for modesty!!!



I totally endorse the 'accept ppl as they are' line. Me thinks, a lot of ppl from this generation do.

[asli_badmash]

I call myself by that nic bcoz I believe I light up people's lives....!!!!.....
So much for modesty!!!

We knew that... But we wanted to hear it from the lady herself ! And the lady has spoken...

FYI: Shameless advertisment is todays norm. If you got IT then show IT. Modesty gayi bhaad mein... We are here, we know who we are and by god we are going to light up the bleeping(censored out) world. So you go girlfriend... pull out the lamps, torches and flood lights if you have to. My genral rule is... we live only once so lets live it up.

Take my nic for example.. I thought I would use "Real Slim Shady"(Eminem Rap Song). but that would have been cliched so I gave it a HYD spin and used asli_badmash. Cute isnt it.

I totally endorse the 'accept ppl as they are' line. Me thinks, a lot of ppl from this generation do.

TRUE.. TRUE... (Badmash nods).

[azazel]

OK

[coolhewk]

itz very funny ...

[bluedelhi]

As a followup - Reasons it's good to be a guy



·Movie nudity is virtually always female.



·You can open all your own jars.



·When clicking through TV channels, you don't have to stall on every shot of someone crying.



·You can go to the bathroom without a support group.



·The garage is all yours.



·You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.



·Nobody secretly wonders if you swallow.



·The National College Cheer leading Championship.



·If you're 34 and single, nobody notices.



·You can get into a non-trivial pissing contest.



·You can be President.



·Flowers fix everything.



·You never have to worry about other people's feelings.



·You get to think about sex 90 percent of your waking hours.



·You can wear a white shirt to a water park.



·You can wear no shirt to a water park.



·The world is your urinal.



·You never misconstrue innocuous statements to mean your lover is about to leave you.



·One mood, all the time.



·You can admire Clint Eastwood without starving yourself to look like him.



·Same work... more pay.



·You don't have to leave the room to make an emergency crotch adjustment.



·With 400 million sperm per shot, you could double the earth's population in 15 tries, at least in theory.



·The remote is yours and yours alone.



·People never glance at your chest when you're talking to them.



·Bachelor parties beat the shit over bridal showers.



·You can buy condoms without the shopkeeper imagining you naked.



·Someday you'll be a dirty old man.



·If another guy shows up at the party in the same outfit, you might become lifelong buddies.



·Porn movies are designed with your mind in mind.



·Your pals can be trusted never to trap you with: 'So... notice anything different?'



·Baywatch.



·The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected.



·All your orgasms are real.

[azazel]

OK

[lg]

hilarous, though kinky...is this a cut, copy paste? coz i havent seen this one before...

[azazel]

hilarous, though kinky...is this a cut, copy paste? coz i havent seen this one before...

YES