The Wife Translations Guide

[asli_badmash]

Some things you just cant explain.....Like why men REALLY don't like to sit up straight EVER. Lol....mysteries of the world.

If you had thing between your legs you wouldnt sit up straight too...

Technically we counter the weight of the "THING" by slouching. I hope I have solved one mystery for you.

[malakpetmasala]

one more thing "i dont understand" or i d rather say dont comprehend is the fact as to why 2 ex girl friends of a guy have to move on to become the best of friends? to bitch about him or to know whats common between them that they were with him??????

You got it... They get togather to find new ways to destroy you. "The enemy of your enemy is your friend"... Plus they love to bitch.

And don't tell me that men never talk behind their ex's back???

Everyne handles a breakup differently........

not with another guy who broke up with the same girl.

[asli_badmash]

Some things you just cant explain.....Like why men REALLY don't like to sit up straight EVER. Lol....mysteries of the world.

If you had thing between your legs you wouldnt sit up straight too...

Technically we counter the weight of the "THING" by slouching. I hope I have solved one mystery for you.

[oneminutecooler]

Some things you just cant explain.....Like why men REALLY don't like to sit up straight EVER. Lol....mysteries of the world.

If you had thing between your legs you wouldnt sit up straight too...
Technically we counter the weight of the "THING" by slouching. I hope I have solved one mystery for you.

Mystery solved....Thanks for the details.

[oneminutecooler]

one more thing "i dont understand" or i d rather say dont comprehend is the fact as to why 2 ex girl friends of a guy have to move on to become the best of friends? to bitch about him or to know whats common between them that they were with him??????

You got it... They get togather to find new ways to destroy you. "The enemy of your enemy is your friend"... Plus they love to bitch.

And don't tell me that men never talk behind their ex's back???

Everyne handles a breakup differently........

not with another guy who broke up with the same girl.

??? Ok I'm going to lose my mind and the whole story soon Lolol. SO lets forget it now. But it really does suck for th people who have to go through a part of life like that......

[malakpetmasala]

one more thing "i dont understand" or i d rather say dont comprehend is the fact as to why 2 ex girl friends of a guy have to move on to become the best of friends? to bitch about him or to know whats common between them that they were with him??????

You got it... They get togather to find new ways to destroy you. "The enemy of your enemy is your friend"... Plus they love to bitch.

i thought the same thing too, but thought of taking a woman s word too.

[malakpetmasala]

You don't have to understand women; Just love them

women are like sausages, no one understands what they are made of, but everyone loves them.

Does that mean women love sausages ?

depends on wether they are hotdogs or frankfurts or rather simple gourment sausages with extra meat and spice in them

[malakpetmasala]

You don't have to understand women; Just love them

women are like sausages, no one understands what they are made of, but everyone loves them.

Does that mean women love sausages ?

i guess u can make this big question clear for both me and AB, do women love sausages?

[malakpetmasala]

one more thing "i dont understand" or i d rather say dont comprehend is the fact as to why 2 ex girl friends of a guy have to move on to become the best of friends? to bitch about him or to know whats common between them that they were with him??????

You got it... They get togather to find new ways to destroy you. "The enemy of your enemy is your friend"... Plus they love to bitch.

And don't tell me that men never talk behind their ex's back???

Everyne handles a breakup differently........

not with another guy who broke up with the same girl.

??? Ok I'm going to lose my mind and the whole story soon Lolol. SO lets forget it now. But it really does suck for th people who have to go through a part of life like that......

I find it rather amusing and at times mysterious.

[oneminutecooler]

You don't have to understand women; Just love them

women are like sausages, no one understands what they are made of, but everyone loves them.

Does that mean women love sausages ?

i guess u can make this big question clear for both me and AB, do women love sausages?

Well, I personally do not like sausages Lol. I do good without them. But even if a women likes sausages, she will NEVER in her right mind eat any infront of a man.

[oneminutecooler]

one more thing "i dont understand" or i d rather say dont comprehend is the fact as to why 2 ex girl friends of a guy have to move on to become the best of friends? to bitch about him or to know whats common between them that they were with him??????

You got it... They get togather to find new ways to destroy you. "The enemy of your enemy is your friend"... Plus they love to bitch.

i thought the same thing too, but thought of taking a woman s word too.

That's nice (and smart) of you to take a womens opinion as well.

[malakpetmasala]

[quote=" sausages Lol. I do good without them. But even if a women likes sausages, she will NEVER in her right mind eat any infront of a man.

has a woman eating a sausage infront of a man got any social implications? i just dont get it. thats one reason i said.... i dont understand women.

[malakpetmasala]

i thought the same thing too, but thought of taking a woman s word too.[/quote]



That's nice (and smart) of you to take a womens opinion as well.[/quote]





i dont know if it is nice, but smart.... oh yeaaaaah!

[oneminutecooler]

[quote=" sausages Lol. I do good without them. But even if a women likes sausages, she will NEVER in her right mind eat any infront of a man.

has a woman eating a sausage infront of a man got any social implications? i just dont get it. thats one reason i said.... i dont understand women.

Well, it's just that, in general, women usually don't feel comfortable eating in front of men......or atleast I don't. But sausages can make your breath smell pretty darn bad, so after eating them, I don't think a women would want to be seeing the guy right then and there. Lol

[malakpetmasala]

[quote=" sausages Lol. I do good without them. But even if a women likes sausages, she will NEVER in her right mind eat any infront of a man.

has a woman eating a sausage infront of a man got any social implications? i just dont get it. thats one reason i said.... i dont understand women.

Well, it's just that, in general, women usually don't feel comfortable eating in front of men......or atleast I don't. But sausages can make your breath smell pretty darn bad, so after eating them, I don't think a women would want to be seeing the guy right then and there. Lol

same goes to pizza , thai and Indian food as well.... but y only a sausage?

[oneminutecooler]

[quote=" sausages Lol. I do good without them. But even if a women likes sausages, she will NEVER in her right mind eat any infront of a man.

has a woman eating a sausage infront of a man got any social implications? i just dont get it. thats one reason i said.... i dont understand women.

Well, it's just that, in general, women usually don't feel comfortable eating in front of men......or atleast I don't. But sausages can make your breath smell pretty darn bad, so after eating them, I don't think a women would want to be seeing the guy right then and there. Lol

same goes to pizza , thai and Indian food as well.... but y only a sausage?

Lol. THat's a tough one....I dunno...You got me

[Alexis]

The whole women not liking to eat in front of men stems from tha fact that women are supposed to be health conscious and in shape. ALWAYS. Women are supposed to have small appetites, eat small dainty bites, and not really finish everything their plate. *sigh* Thats what I see here in America anyway. You wont find a girl ordering a double cheese burger with fries and a milkshake on a date. The guy will get that while the girl gets a salad and water.

[asli_badmash]

The whole women not liking to eat in front of men stems from tha fact that women are supposed to be health conscious and in shape. ALWAYS.

Where can I find this species of women.. . I would have to disagree... All the women I went out with had a T-Rex of an apetite and I go out with women of all shapes(pardon the pun).



Maybe the american girls have this reservation. Now that I think about it; but there is a fine line of disticntion between such women. Let me put it this way.... The women I wanted to be with ate a good portion. The women who wanted to be with me ate a lesser portion. I think your argument applies here.

[oneminutecooler]

The whole women not liking to eat in front of men stems from tha fact that women are supposed to be health conscious and in shape. ALWAYS. Women are supposed to have small appetites, eat small dainty bites, and not really finish everything their plate. *sigh* Thats what I see here in America anyway. You wont find a girl ordering a double cheese burger with fries and a milkshake on a date. The guy will get that while the girl gets a salad and water.

Yeah that's a better notion on it Alexis. Lol. I couldn't come up with anything at the time. But yes, that works and can apply as well.

Good going again Alexis



But you know, I think the only way you can know if you atleast have a REAL chance for a long-term relationship with someone is if you can act like yourself and not hide anything.....including how much you really eat.

[asli_badmash]

But you know, I think the only way you can know if you atleast have a REAL chance for a long-term relationship with someone is if you can act like yourself and not hide anything.....including how much you really eat.

Sometimes a long term relation is decided by how much you dont eat. If I have to go out with someone who chews though my pocket.. I will think twice before going out the next time.



I appreciate women having a good apetite and being themselves and all.. but moderation is the key.

[oneminutecooler]

But you know, I think the only way you can know if you atleast have a REAL chance for a long-term relationship with someone is if you can act like yourself and not hide anything.....including how much you really eat.

Sometimes a long term relation is decided by how much you dont eat. If I have to go out with someone who chews though my pocket.. I will think twice before going out the next time.

I appreciate women having a good apetite and being themselves and all.. but moderation is the key.

Yeah that's true as well.......but isn't it more about the love in the relationship and liking each other for personality? But if the person over-eats (most probably making them over-weight) I think that after they get to know the other person, and if they end up really liking them, theyll probably diet a bit anyways, just to make life easier on you and not to show anything that'll turn you off



Just my opinion.

[asli_badmash]

but isn't it more about the love in the relationship and liking each other for personality? But if the person over-eats (most probably making them over-weight) I think that after they get to know the other person, and if they end up really liking them, theyll probably diet a bit anyways, just to make life easier on you and not to show anything that'll turn you off. Just my opinion.

And a good and honest opinion that is. Yes it is always about the love in the relationship.



I was just kidding about the food part. Anyday, I would go out with a person who can eat my share of the Pizza too. Its kinda cool that way.. In a day and age were more women are anorexic... its good to know someone is eating a good share. In fact you are right OMC... I would appreciate if the girl eats the right portion. That way I know she is not being pretentious and just being herself.



I used to know this one girl.. who could eat the whole Pizza and not show an ounce of weight for that. She was so cool.

[malakpetmasala]

why are we complicating a simple thing like girls eating a sausage or rather not eating a sausage in the company of men?



cos, all the girls i know (well, atleast the ones who eat sausages) ate them in masculine company too. not that sausage is a representation of a phallus or something (well, unless u want it to be). n not that a sausage tastes different to men and to women. OR DOES IT?

[malakpetmasala]

PMS- Right to remain/or atleast want to be the dictator of the house.

[lizard king]

She Is Not HORNY - She Is SEXUALLY FOCUSED.

She Is Not A SCREAMER Or MOANER - She Is VOCALLY APPRECIATIVE.

She Is Not CONCEITED - She Is INTIMATELY AWARE OF HER BEST QUALITIES.

She Is Not EASY - She Is HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE.

She Is Not A BLEACHED BLONDE - She Is PEROXIDE DEPENDENT.

She Does Not GET YOU EXCITED - She Causes TEMPORARY BLOOD DISPLACEMENT

She Is Not A BAD COOK - She Is MICROWAVE COMPATIBLE.

She Is Not HALF NAKED - She Is WARDROBE IMPAIRED.

She Does Not Wear TOO MUCH JEWELRY - She Is METALLICALLY OVERBURDENED.

She Does Not Want To Be MARRIED - She Wants To Lock You In DOMESTIC INCARCERATION.

She Does Not GAIN WEIGHT - She Is A METABOLIC UNDERACHIEVER.

She Does Not TEASE Or FLIRT - She Engages In ARTIFICIAL STIMULATION.

She Is Not DUMB - She Is A DETOUR OFF THE INFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY.

She Is Not KINKY - She Is A NON-INHIBITED SEXUAL COMPANION.

She Is Not TOO SKINNY - She Is SKELETALLY PROMINENT.

She Does Not HAVE A MOUSTACHE - She Is IN TOUCH WITH HER MASCULINE SIDE.

She Does Not HATE TELEVISED SPORTS - She Is ATHLETICALLY IGNORANT.

She Has Not BEEN AROUND - She Is A PREVIOUSLY ENJOYED COMPANION.

She Does Not WEAR TOO MUCH PERFUME - She Commits FRAGRANCE ABUSE.

She Is Not A SLUT - She Is SEXUALLY EXTROVERTED.

She Does Not Have A KILLER BODY - She Is TERMINALLY ATTRACTIVE.

She Does Not GO SHOPPING - She Is MALL FLUENT.

She Is Not An AIRHEAD - She Is REALITY IMPAIRED.

She Does Not Get DRUNK Or TIPSY - She Gets CHEMICALLY INCONVENIENCED.

She Does Not Get FAT Or CHUBBY - She Achieves MAXIMUM DENSITY.

She Is Not COLD Or FRIGID - She Is THERMALLY INACCESSIBLE.

She Does Not WEAR TOO MUCH MAKEUP - She Has Reached COSMETIC SATURATION.

She Does Not Have BREAST IMPLANTS - She Is GRAVITY RESISTANT.

She Does Not NAG YOU - She Becomes VERBALLY REPETITIVE.

She Is Not LOOSE - She Is MORALLY IMPAIRED.

She Does Not Have MAJOR LEAGUE HOOTERS - She Is PECTORALLY SUPERIOR.

She Does Not Have THIN LIPS - She Is COLLAGEN DEPENDENT.







why does it has to be that i am the only contributer to this column?